”Sensational” Soft Skills By Kurt Larsson

”Sensational” Soft Skills™, by Kurt Larsson

Fist and palm - Version 2The conscious use of the word ”sensational”, when describing Expanding Understanding’s ”Sensational Soft Skills Toolbox™” is, of course, a deliberate play on words. ”Sensational”, used as a superlative adjective, is derived from the use of sensational as having to do with the senses. It is based upon our ability to feel. Feeling is what still separates us from computers and machines. Although, computers and machines keep getting better at ”sensing” (as in objectively measuring changes), their capabilities are still a long way off from being able to ”sense” (as in to subjectively feel something). Which hand in this picture do you think is capable of feeling more? Why?

Feeling is the Critical Component in what makes each ”Sensational Soft Skill™” sensational. When working with these tools you will experience and learn that your ability to feel is fundamental to keeping you present, here and now. Very few people currently seem to really understand the depth what “being present” really means and even fewer seem to appreciate the power and utility of this unique state. One of the intentions of filling this toolbox with these sensational tools is to bring forth the value and power of being present; and with that revelation, provide you examples, experiences and evidence demonstrating the presents (as in gifts) that being in such a state can create in your life.

On the flip side of this feelings coin, it is much harder to betray, deceive, intrude upon or harm another being if you are truly present to what you are currently feeling. At a minimum feeling will put another dimension in your way of acting impulsively and apathetically. This may sound logical, but until you really experience the meaning of this simple realization in all its sensual beauty it has little or no power to change you, the relationships you have, or the world you wish to live in. Therein lies a sensational possibility as well as the biggest hurdle.

It is probably worth mentioning here that there is a whole group of people that have been trained, conditioned (and some would say born) to avoid feeling. Sociopathic and psychopathic behavior seem to be based upon avoiding feeling anything for anyone or anything. Having nerves of steel and being cold and calculating have been praised and marketed as the surest path to success. Maybe, but isn’t it time to wonder about what sort of success and in what kind of world?

The possibility, of course, is to begin really sensing (in this case both measuring as well as feeling) the consequences of your thoughts, words and deeds and begin to adjust them so that they produce a more empathetic and caring environment. Just think, this little behavioral change may be the long lost key to produce real traction for the ancient idea of ”The Golden Rule”. As a reminder this, at least intellectually, states to ”do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. What if the difference between knowing the Golden Rule and understanding it lies in attaching your personal, heartfelt feelings when practicing this rule? Actually, daring to feel what you feel will take this exercise out of the domain of intellectual debate and into the world of action and result. You are invited to actually bathe in the feelings this paragraph produces within you and get a sense of what this can mean for you and those around you. With each actual attempt to feel and empathize with others will gain you additional insight to your own internal workings as well as of those around you.

The biggest hurdle is that this whole process starts (and most likely finishes) as an internal affair. Many of us (perhaps you too?!) would much rather preoccupy themselves with some sort of task in order to avoid feeling what lies underneath the surface of their ”have a nice day” street face. Many use pain killers and stomach remedies to further deaden this internal conversation. It is refreshing to hear more and more people actually admitting that they intentionally keep themselves busy or sedated in order to avoid allowing their inner feelings to surface. Although this may seem cowardly on the surface, especially to those of us that don’t even consciously know we are also doing the same thing, it is actually the first brave step forward in recognizing the rest of the iceberg of subconscious thoughts and feelings lurking beneath, yearning to be free.

And what if “yearning to be free” is exactly what they are doing? Whether in the form of unconscious-behavioral ticks, constant aches and pains, ulcers, headaches, obsessions, phobias, cheap signaling, etc; it takes energy to withhold and surpress those feelings that yearn to express themselves. Anybody that has ever had a massage, a session of psychotherapy or bodywork (Body Harmony anyone?) and felt better afterwards knows (and maybe even understands) how much releasing those pent up feelings has to do with their attitude and well-being. Consciously allowing these feelings to surface, more often than not, involves opening up the darkest and potentially scariest can of sensual worms you will ever have to deal with. Is it any wonder that most of us, even today, would still rather surpress and carry these old, often festering psychological (and often physiological) wounds with them to their graves. Again, it takes energy to hold back this information and guts to allow them to surface. Yet, as with any endeavor the more resistance you face the sweeter eventual victory will taste.

What if the only thing that is missing to actually address, what we practitioners of Body Harmony® call, ”the issues in the tissue” is an up-to-date, specific set of tools and the instructions necessary to use them appropriately and effectively. Are you starting to get a sense of the power and utility of the tools that exist in the seven main drawers of Expanding Understanding’s ”Sensational Soft Skills Toolbox”? Instead of constantly ”re-leasing” all that energy you need to limit and contain all those suppressed feelings and those ineffective behavior patterns, here are some tools for easily, effectively and (more often than not) enjoyably ”releasing” them once and for all. Where in your life could you then use all that freed up energy?

So when these particular soft skills were deemed ”Sensational” it was to deliberately draw attention to their power to help you discover and feel what you have been missing in your life and relationships. This ability to feel and ”emote” what we are feeling is still our domain as humans. With any luck and perhaps a little help from these tools, this will continue to distinguish us as human beings from all other species, even human ”doings”.

For more information on how to apply these tools in your work environment and communication please contact us here or ring us at +46 708 736 375.

Copyright Kurt Larsson 2013, All rights reserved.

About The Author


I am fascinated with what makes us humans ”tick”, especially when it comes to how we consciously communicate and express ourselves with our body language. My business background is in international sales and sales management, selling everything from automobile tires in Houston, Tx, to retail banking delivery systems in 20 countries. I have graduated from CoachU’s 3 year Coach Training program, been certified as an Extended DISC consultant and become a Certified International Body Harmony Teacher with over 20 years of ”hands-on” experience in bodywork. This rich and varied background combined with over 20 years of being an entrepreneur has blessed me with insights and experiences I never would have noticed in the corporate world. Mainstream business now seems to be waking up to the riches available from more conscious and responsible business practices. Expanding Understanding’s Sensational Soft Skills Toolbox , the books I have written and training I have developed now provide savvy decision makers and their colleagues measurable results and a more restful night's sleep. These tools provide an edge in consciously understanding, deliberately using and profiting from the most powerful communication tool available, our bodies. I look forward to meeting you on this path to mastery in non verbal communication.

1 Comment